Movies are violent

Second post. Could not pass up the chance to tell the tale of two weeks ago. Me and the girlfriend went to see the movie "Watchmen" I'll get to that in another post. The next day we decided to press our luck with going back to watch another movie "Last house on the left". We had filled up on Reese's pieces and popcorn the day before thus ruining our diet so we decided to just get a soda. Now, My girlfriend Cathy likes to remind me daily that I am rather picky about the food I eat. I am to an extent. I know what I like and I don't like to try to many new things. Food is something you can be picky about. Most people are. Now Cathy is picky about soda. As in she only drinks one kind. Mountain Dew. Or MTN Dew. Whatever the hell they are calling it now. She doesn't drink any dark soda. She doesn't even like much light soda. She will choke down a 7up if it is all that is available or drink a sprite if the occasion calls for it, but Mountain Dew is the only thing she really likes. Add to that the fact that she hates having ice in her drink. Not for any other reason than, and I quote, "they charge us the same for less soda if you get ice. If I don't get ice I get more soda for the same price."

That is my life folks. Wouldn't have it any other way. So we head into the movie. Behind us is an old couple. Not sure if this is really the movie to go to for your 40th anniversary. In front of us sits an Asian couple. In my experience those people who start off conversations with "I'm not racist but...." typically are about to say something racist. I'm not saying that they are Asian to imply some sort of racist comment, I'm just trying to paint a picture. About have way through a very decent movie these two start to talk. Not the raspy voiced whispers normally present in a movie theatre. I'm talking like pool hall conversation talking. I lean forward and say "Stop talking." They do. They are now my marionette. Five minutes later, it starts again. This time I give a very polite "Shut up!" Again the strings are pulled shut. The climax of the picture. A very good ending, but one that was accompanied by the jaw jacking of the couple yet again. This time I tell them to shut the F*** up. Not the smartest thing on my part, I know. But I was pissed.

As the credits roll, this guy stands up and starts glaring at me. At least I think he was it was dark. I give him the ol' "what are you doing" hand gesture. He explains to me in nice sophisticated words that I was going to get my ass beat. Now were having fun. He and his girlfriend, wife, sister whatever she was starts in on the fun to. You don't know fun until you get threatened in another language. That's what it digresses to. These two walk out of the theatre and we can still hear them in the hallway.

After a little bit me and the girlfriend leave the theatre also. She bombs away to the bathroom and I stand in the lobby. My gaze drifts over to my left. Standing about eight feet away from me is the now illuminated Asian male who has just informed me of his desire to fight me. or "take it outside" as it was. As I get a look at this guy I do the only thing I can. I laugh. Now, I am 6 foot 1, 200 lbs. Not a small guy by any stretch. This guy is maybe 5'5", maybe 120 lbs. Plus he has a very masculine ponytail that trails down to his belt line. This guy stares into my eyes and snaps. He starts jaw jacking again about taking it outside. As outside is maybe 20 feet away it seems that he could just fight me here. Also, he is 8 feet away from me. If your going to threaten someone, and really plan on carrying through with it, you tend to get up in someones face. As it would take a step latter for this guy to get in my face I understand the cowardice.

The guy walks outside and starts pacing back and forth. I continue laughing. Other people are now laughing at this sight. It's pretty funny when you think about it. A little guy with no intention of fighting me has now taken to pacing outside waiting for me. What is this obsession with going outside? Oh, that's right. Easier to run away. I forgot. The girlfriend returns from the restroom and asks me if that's the guy. We start to head for the door when the Asian guys lady friend comes back inside. She and my girl start to argue with each other about the reason for the original argument. Silly huh? Now, the movie theatre has those doors that you can only go out of you can't go into. I put my hand on this door but kept Angry dude in my sight. His lady is saying there is not going to be a fight. The dude looks like he isn't getting the message. I turn to look at the girlfriend and this coward sees his opportunity. He grabs my jacket and attempts to pull me outside. I say attempts because a 5'5" guy is not going to pull a 200 lbs white guy anywhere. I don't move an inch. My jacket does. He tears it off my shoulder, ruining a perfectly good hoodie. I turn to look back at this guy cause now I'm mad. I'm looking at nothing but daylight and a cloud of smoke where this guy once was. I turn back to the front door and see nothing but a cloud of smoke where the girl once was. I turn back and these two are high stepping it back to there van. In a matter of seconds they are a full 50 feet away. NFL running backs would love to have this kind of speed.

So I lose a jacket that I really like and this guy looses his self respect as he wets himself. Fun time at the movies. The thing that really mad me mad was the lack of support I got from the 40 people who witnessed this whole thing. No one asked if I was ok (most likely because no one believed that this guy could hurt me in the first place) no one called the cops when this guy was threatening me, the manager didn't even get the license place because he stopped to talk to another customer. Where have all the helpful people gone? Apparently they don't watch movies at Marcus Cinema. So, let's all go to the movies to grab ourselves some assault.

I did enjoy the movie by the way. Last house on the Left was a very decent movie. One I would suggest you go see. Or go and watch at home so you don't get into it with some angry Asians.